FYI: I deleted my last post, because I don't believe my adopted son has Williams syndrome or Down Syndrome. I won't know "what" Jonathan has until we have a vacation in Washington state (to visit family), since there is no genecist here in Nevada. I don't know when we will be visiting Washington next.... We believe Jonathan has FAS/FASD, which is a completely different parenting ballgame than parenting a child with Down syndrome- at least that's what I've come to conclusion to based on what I've read from other mother's blogs and groups. I'm thankful that the Ukraine misdiagnosed Jonathan, because FAS is not on their approved list of health problems which would make a child available for inter country adoption before their 5th birthday.
I almost don't want to do testing until Jonathan can understand more English. I feel bad how low he tested into the the school district for special ed preschool. He has 3 things against him: Having some sort of "syndrome", not knowing the language, and living in an orphanage his entire life. Comparing Jonathan now, about 3 months after all of his testings, I would say he is understanding me more and more!
Jonathan knows lots of different signs, and is starting to use them to communicate. He use to just repeat whatever sign I would show him, but have temper tantrums not realizing I am teaching a communication tool to help him "talk" to me. But I am seeing him just begin to "talk" now (with his hands). Verbally, he will repeat sounds like, "Da Da Da" or "Ma Ma Ma" "Bub Bub Bub" and "Up Up Up". But he can sign "Mommy" "Daddy" "More" "Please" "Eat" "All Done" "Yummy" "Happy", he will clap his hands when I say "yay!", he will give high-5's when I say "Good job!", he's signing "boy" and knows when I call him a "Good Boy"... and there's more, but he's giving me excellent eye contact now and is really engaging in the "conversation" when before he would just look around and get distracted by the slightest noise or light- or anything!
When Jonathan first came home he did a lot of finger sucking, and rocking- making crazy angry noises. We knew this was common post-orphanage behavior, as he is trying to cope with the change. The first thing I worked on was the finger sucking (it was the two middle fingers on his left hand), he was always sucking it! So I would take his hand out of his mouth and say "No fingers". I was very good about being diligent about reminding him. At night, he would wear one of daddy's long sock underneath his PJ's so he couldn't suck his fingers. Less and less he would do this. I would even see him bring his hand up to his mouth and then shake his head and put his hand down to stop himself.
Jonathan then mouthed everything. Toys, as if he were a baby! He would even kiss the walls, lick the glass door. I would remove the toy out of his mouth and say "No mouth", and if he did it again, I would take the toy away for a little while. Now, I've read about replacing the toys with a specific oral/motor chewing toy, but I don't have extra money at moment for things like that. But so far saying "No mouth" does make him stop and take the toy out of his mouth on his own. The finger and mouth occurrences happen less and less frequently.
I am now working on his fussiness. He can get very agitated at a toy and start making fussy whiny noises. Now if he starts crying, I always remove him and give him a time out to his room. He is obviously over-stimulated if he is overly whiny or is crying or starts throwing toys. When he starts getting whiny I bring my finger up to my mouth and say "SHHH" (He knows this from the wheels on the bus song) and I say "No fussy". If he still is fussy I say "be happy" and I sign happy- he knows this from the "if you're happy and you know it" song. I am still working on his fussiness. But I am keeping things simple, and communicating what he can understand. I will try to remove the toy or whatever is stimulating him, and distract him or whatnot. But so far this is helping him. He knows my expectations, and it keeps me from getting mad at him- since I have a system in place.
Instead on rocking on the floor and making angry noises, Jonathan has stopped this and now just does weird "pelvic thrustings" on the ground. It looks bizarre and I just tell him to "Get up" and he usually stops what he's doing and sits up. I sign the word "Weird"- because it's all I know sign-wise, but he knows that is something he can not do. So I guess I'll just start signing "Weird" for other socially unacceptable things to help him learn!
We are having issues with him feeding himself. I have stopped focusing on this and making it a session of me feeding him, but he has to communicate by signing to get food. We also work on vocalizations of different words this way. I do this with David sitting right next to him. They both are on the exact same page with signing and vocalizations so it is excellent speech therapy this way, and it becomes a happy, non-crying outburst event when I try to help him feed himself. He can feed himself finger foods, but holding the spoon/sassy spoon- forget it! I personally think it's too many steps for him to figure out... but then again the first 2 weeks home he spoon fed himself just fine, then one day stopped and started crying and throwing his hands in the air in refusal to touch the spoon. Interesting... I am much happier working on speech therapy at the moment, and so is he. We will address this again in the near future.
So Jonathan has made excellent progress as a whole! I just read about a week or so ago that some moms use the Google translate app to help communicate to their child. I haven't done this! I'm sure that is super helpful as well! Before the adoption, I took a speech therapy class called the Hanen Workshop, which really equipped me for handling a non-verbal kid- I now have 2 of them! But I keep things short, simple, I use signs with the words, I'm consistent.... oh, And he loves the Signing Time DVD's. So all of the above has really helped him! I also recommend eliminating a good amount of toys from the play room. Put them away. Bring one out for fun that you will play with to teach how to properly play with certain particular toys, but put it away afterwards. My son does a lot better with fewer toys scattered about- especially anything with small pieces. Besides, he usually just finds a sock somewhere and starts twirling it in the air, and that ends up being is his favorite toy!
I hope this post is helpful to someone out there. It's really hard learning how to parent an adopted special needs child. My adopted son is a 4 year old, but was evaluated by the school district at a 19-month old level. I know if he were evaluated now, it would be at a somewhat higher level, but that is probably a common evaluation for a child such as Jonathan! Anyways, I'd love to hear your thoughts. No trolls please, I will delete your comments for sure!
Jonathan pictures:
I almost don't want to do testing until Jonathan can understand more English. I feel bad how low he tested into the the school district for special ed preschool. He has 3 things against him: Having some sort of "syndrome", not knowing the language, and living in an orphanage his entire life. Comparing Jonathan now, about 3 months after all of his testings, I would say he is understanding me more and more!
Jonathan knows lots of different signs, and is starting to use them to communicate. He use to just repeat whatever sign I would show him, but have temper tantrums not realizing I am teaching a communication tool to help him "talk" to me. But I am seeing him just begin to "talk" now (with his hands). Verbally, he will repeat sounds like, "Da Da Da" or "Ma Ma Ma" "Bub Bub Bub" and "Up Up Up". But he can sign "Mommy" "Daddy" "More" "Please" "Eat" "All Done" "Yummy" "Happy", he will clap his hands when I say "yay!", he will give high-5's when I say "Good job!", he's signing "boy" and knows when I call him a "Good Boy"... and there's more, but he's giving me excellent eye contact now and is really engaging in the "conversation" when before he would just look around and get distracted by the slightest noise or light- or anything!
When Jonathan first came home he did a lot of finger sucking, and rocking- making crazy angry noises. We knew this was common post-orphanage behavior, as he is trying to cope with the change. The first thing I worked on was the finger sucking (it was the two middle fingers on his left hand), he was always sucking it! So I would take his hand out of his mouth and say "No fingers". I was very good about being diligent about reminding him. At night, he would wear one of daddy's long sock underneath his PJ's so he couldn't suck his fingers. Less and less he would do this. I would even see him bring his hand up to his mouth and then shake his head and put his hand down to stop himself.
Jonathan then mouthed everything. Toys, as if he were a baby! He would even kiss the walls, lick the glass door. I would remove the toy out of his mouth and say "No mouth", and if he did it again, I would take the toy away for a little while. Now, I've read about replacing the toys with a specific oral/motor chewing toy, but I don't have extra money at moment for things like that. But so far saying "No mouth" does make him stop and take the toy out of his mouth on his own. The finger and mouth occurrences happen less and less frequently.
I am now working on his fussiness. He can get very agitated at a toy and start making fussy whiny noises. Now if he starts crying, I always remove him and give him a time out to his room. He is obviously over-stimulated if he is overly whiny or is crying or starts throwing toys. When he starts getting whiny I bring my finger up to my mouth and say "SHHH" (He knows this from the wheels on the bus song) and I say "No fussy". If he still is fussy I say "be happy" and I sign happy- he knows this from the "if you're happy and you know it" song. I am still working on his fussiness. But I am keeping things simple, and communicating what he can understand. I will try to remove the toy or whatever is stimulating him, and distract him or whatnot. But so far this is helping him. He knows my expectations, and it keeps me from getting mad at him- since I have a system in place.
Instead on rocking on the floor and making angry noises, Jonathan has stopped this and now just does weird "pelvic thrustings" on the ground. It looks bizarre and I just tell him to "Get up" and he usually stops what he's doing and sits up. I sign the word "Weird"- because it's all I know sign-wise, but he knows that is something he can not do. So I guess I'll just start signing "Weird" for other socially unacceptable things to help him learn!
We are having issues with him feeding himself. I have stopped focusing on this and making it a session of me feeding him, but he has to communicate by signing to get food. We also work on vocalizations of different words this way. I do this with David sitting right next to him. They both are on the exact same page with signing and vocalizations so it is excellent speech therapy this way, and it becomes a happy, non-crying outburst event when I try to help him feed himself. He can feed himself finger foods, but holding the spoon/sassy spoon- forget it! I personally think it's too many steps for him to figure out... but then again the first 2 weeks home he spoon fed himself just fine, then one day stopped and started crying and throwing his hands in the air in refusal to touch the spoon. Interesting... I am much happier working on speech therapy at the moment, and so is he. We will address this again in the near future.
So Jonathan has made excellent progress as a whole! I just read about a week or so ago that some moms use the Google translate app to help communicate to their child. I haven't done this! I'm sure that is super helpful as well! Before the adoption, I took a speech therapy class called the Hanen Workshop, which really equipped me for handling a non-verbal kid- I now have 2 of them! But I keep things short, simple, I use signs with the words, I'm consistent.... oh, And he loves the Signing Time DVD's. So all of the above has really helped him! I also recommend eliminating a good amount of toys from the play room. Put them away. Bring one out for fun that you will play with to teach how to properly play with certain particular toys, but put it away afterwards. My son does a lot better with fewer toys scattered about- especially anything with small pieces. Besides, he usually just finds a sock somewhere and starts twirling it in the air, and that ends up being is his favorite toy!
I hope this post is helpful to someone out there. It's really hard learning how to parent an adopted special needs child. My adopted son is a 4 year old, but was evaluated by the school district at a 19-month old level. I know if he were evaluated now, it would be at a somewhat higher level, but that is probably a common evaluation for a child such as Jonathan! Anyways, I'd love to hear your thoughts. No trolls please, I will delete your comments for sure!
Jonathan pictures:
